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Travel StoriesBogger's Et Al's Polish Adventure
Poland To Czech With Nitwits
Ride Date - Mid July 2024
By Bogger
Day 6
Morning soon came around and it was time to pack away and head for The Czech Republic. Camping at Plaza Czocha Beach Resort had been cheap at £5.60 a night, bargain. Sadly they didn’t do breakfast so we headed back to the small village we had passed through yesterday.
Luckily there was a Lidl type shop there and we all went inside and chose something to eat now and something for later. I’d paid with Zloty and as I’m walking out I’m doing a calculation in my head as to how much I had actually spent. From recollection I'd picked up about five items. A small bottle of fresh orange, a croissant filled with jam, a bag of sweets, a bag of crisps and a small yogurt. Total cost £1.35! Jason came out behind me and I could see him doing a similar calculation to me. Plenty cheap.
Myself and Pete would need fuel fairly soon as we hadn’t filled up last night like the others had. It’s time to get going and head towards Karlovy Vary, in the Czech Republic. Some of us had been to the Czech Republic and indeed Karlovy Vary before. The roads seemed much busier than when we were here last. The trip was beginning to tell on us a bit as well. Lots of miles on small bikes is definitely tiring.
We tried to keep off the main roads as much as possible, but there were a few miles done on the motorways. We had our usual sat-nav issues which sent us off on wild goose chases. We stopped for fuel after forty five miles. After only seventy eight miles we are all knackered and feeling very tired. Time is on our side today as we only have to cover a mere one hundred and sixty five miles in total.
We pull up in yet another small village to discuss the possibility of having a break. As it happens right across from where we’ve pulled in is a small car park with a roadside café. None of us have a clue as to whether we are still in Poland or have crossed into the Czech Republic. No matter. I’m first to the outside counter of the café perusing the menu board.
High Tech Pete joins me. I mime me taking a drink out of a cup and say coffee, café please. She nods her head in recognition of what I’m after. I also notice the seemingly universal words of Hot Dog. One hot dog duly ordered. Pete points to the menu board and in a thick Welsh accent orders coffee. She gives him a quizzical look and repeats café. Pete nods his head, points to the board and repeats café. He was a bit non-plussed when she handed him a coffee ice cream. I nearly wet myself laughing. He also cocked up the ordering of a hot dog as well.
It was fairly hot again today at 23 degrees.
We set off again and before too long we are on the outskirts of Karlovy Vary. We drop down through the forest and onto the winding B222 which hugs the banks of the Ohre river. It's really is a nice part of Europe.
Na Spici campsite in Radosov is only nine miles from the centre of Karlovy Vary but it feels like a million. The last time we were here the campsite was deserted, we were the only ones camping. Not this time, it was very busy. Oh dear, will they let us stay, is there enough room? We used our mercurial charm again and paid our site fees of seven pounds each per night. We could choose a pitch anywhere we fancied. Although busy there was actually still plenty of space. Our stay at Na Spici was for two nights.
As we are pitching our tents BCP exclaimed that he’s left a tent pole in Poland. The one which supports his front canopy has gone awol. Shaking my head I pick up my trusty Swiss Army knife and retire to the banks of the Ohre river some fifty yards away. Here I select a suitable sapling and whittle him a new three metre tent pole. It was worth it just to see his little face light up. I said to him I can make you a tent pole no problem, but the waterproof jacket that you’ve left in a layby in East Germany will take a while longer to manufacture. Tit.
No campsite cooking today, we're off up to the outdoor campsite restaurant and bar. A large steak meal with a pint of lager was a shade under fifteen pounds. Not too expensive, considering the beautiful surroundings. Obviously we all stayed until the bar shut, why wouldn’t you. Later in the evening we had ordered a round of Bechelovka, the Czechia national drink. Err we didn’t order any more, not to our taste I’m afraid.
The temperature was still high when we retired to the tents.
Total mileage 165 miles.
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Let The Chaos Commence
After the where's and why's it's time for a long ride from The Midlands to Belgium. It doesn't all go according to plan but relative to this lot's usual mayhem - it's a good start.
Not Too Much Chaos
It's all going far too well - I mean losing half your crew is an everyday occurrence ain't it? Well it is for this lot. There's little mention of beer.
Old Men Crossing Rivers
I'm getting rather concerned for Bogger. Not much beer, early to bed, no-one lost, and no mechanical tomfoolery. There's a catch, surely there's a catch
Chaos Towards Colditz
More mayhem from a bunch of blokes old enough to know better. Brits used to try and get out of Colditz, these lads are struggling to get in. Fear not - there is beer.
Escape From Colditz To Poland
The lads take a brief look around Colditz before making a dash for Poland. There's a handful of shenanigans and guess what - beer.
Poland To Czech With Nitwits
After a night in Poland the British Buffoons head into The Czech Republic. They're tired and reading between the lines getting a little grumpy, but there's booze and food so they'll be fine.
Reader's Comments
nab301 said :-
£1.35 for "Breakfast" sounds good and considering the recent (hot) weather at home 23°C sounds lovely!
Nigel
15/07/2025 12:49:19 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
Beer, steak, whittling and fire water....what's not to like. Just don't get caught with that knife at border control.
Upt.
15/07/2025 23:04:10 UTC
Bogger said :-
Yeah you can't beat a bit of whittling, or steak and specifically beer.
You can't really beat the Czech Republic either.
Regarding sharp implements and customs! A few years ago on a motorcycle trip to Normandy we were stopped by customs at Dover. Four of us were asked to pull into the customs shed.
My first thoughts were, please don't ask us to unpack our gear. I'd spent an eternity getting everything to fit onto the Honda C90, so it was balanced and looked tidy. The thought of unloading it all sent me into a cold sweat.
Then I had a really hot sweat when I remembered the rather large, sharp, French (obviously) hunting err implement in my top box.
I thought, this is not going to end well!
As we pull into the shed, a customs guy, who looked remarkably like Captain Birdseye ambles up to us, and says.
Alright lads (here we go) have you got any guns, knives or illegal immigrants on or in your vehicle.
We all looked at each other, shook our heads and muttered in the negative. OK he says, on your way and have a good trip. We were in the customs shed for about five seconds total.
Bogger
16/07/2025 21:23:25 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
I had a similar experience at Portsmouth, he asked to look in the tank bag and top box. It was only a few days later that I realised I had a small Swiss Army jobby in the bottom of the tank bag.
16/07/2025 23:15:03 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
I mean... how far do you go with this knives thing? I have a small Leatherman el-cheapo copy tool with a knife - ought I declare that? Will they confiscate it? I also have 2 plastic knives (no, really, thin wobbly knife shaped plastic things - you could barely spread butter) as part of my cooking kit. Do they go into Campervans and confiscate the bread knife, the steak knives and the butter knife?
I feel as though it's a "catch all". You're nice to us, we find your knife "oh, that's OK crack on", you're rude to us we find your knife "you're nicked and you're not getting on this boat, coming into our country, etc etc etc".
Oh, "Got any explosives?" Well I have 17 litres of liquid high explosives in the tank, 2 bottles of high pressure explosives in my campingaz bottles?
17/07/2025 08:10:49 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
I think your Leatherman remark is an interesting one Ed me lad. If it's anything like mine I wonder if it could even be regarded as a lock knife, which is naughty anyway.
Upt.
18/07/2025 07:07:24 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
Oh lordy we're into a whole world of weird now ain't we. I seem to recall that here in blighty you can't even own a lock knife? My understanding of lock knife is kinda like a penknife that opens up but when it's in the open position some kind of mechanism prevents is from being closed? Rather than a firm push against a spring as you'd find with a regular penknife. Well my Leatherman copy does not "lock" it just has a spring as per a penknife.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse - but sometimes the law is so ridiculously finnicky a regular person has no chance of knowing all the details. And knowing ALL the details when you enter another country is frankly not possible.
I think a Leatherman style too might be more easily confused with a butterfly knife?
18/07/2025 07:37:31 UTC
Ian Soady¹ said :-
I understood that a lock knife was a synonym for flick knife - ie one where the blade pops out when you press a button then stays in the open position. Although Claude seems to disagree.
18/07/2025 09:59:55 UTC
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